Cut Me Free by OLIVIA

It is telling me that
I cannot escape
It is telling me that
I cannot forget
Just like a broken record, repeating it to me
You're getting my attention
It makes me weary

Oh you're so strong
You get stronger when I,
Stronger when I believe you

Cut me free, memorizing monster
Cut me free, memorizing monster
Cut me free, memorizing monster
Cut me free, memorizing monster

It is telling me that
I am gonna choke
It is telling me that
I am strange
Just like a broken record, repeating it to me
Comparing always comparing
I can't take it

You live off my compassion
I am the one
That keeps you alive
I feel you pull me under
Fall into your trap
Now you're taking control of me


Cut me free, memorizing monster
Cut me free, memorizing monster
Cut me free, memorizing monster
Cut me free, memorizing monster

When you fall asleep
The ropes come undone
I feel the wind hit my face
If only I can be here all the time


The beautiful haunting vocals of Olivia Lufkin.. Man i need to find her albums >.> It's the new song on the player but the autoplay seems to have died and gone to hell so click on the play button to hear it =)

Distance by Long Shot Party

You're my friend
aa ano hi no yume
Ima de mo mada wasurete nain desho
You are my dream
aa hajimatta bakka
kimi no one longest way
oh ima tabidatsu yo

Everyday kono saki mo shining day
Kawarazu singin hikaru asa no smile
Kore de miosame no funny days
Tobidatsu future mezashita go far
kokoro no dream of

I'll go the distance
mihatenu sora wa blue
Norikonda star ship
kore ga saikou no forever trip

You are my friend
aa ano hi no yumeI
ma de mo mada wasurete nain desho
You are my dream
aa hajimatta bakka
kimi no one longest way
Oh ima tabitasu yo

Thank you my friend
aa ano hi no koto
Ima de mo mada oboeteru kara
You're my dream
aa mou nidoto sou modora nai days
oh I'll go the distance

Kakushikire nai kurai no
ooki na uso o tsuite
Nomikomareru hanne
kore wa saikou no trip
Make tsuzuke no geemukore
kara hajimatteku one dream

You're my friend
aa ano hi no yume
Ima de mo mada wasurete nain desho
You are my dream
aa hajimatta bakka
kimi no one longest way
oh ima tabidatsu yo
Thank you my friend
aa ano hi no koto
Ima de mo mada obeteru kara
You're my dream
aa mou nidoto sou modora nai days
Mou ugokidashita asu e
kisetashi nai Flame of Heart
Sou I'll go the distance

Naruto shippuuden ending02 credits to dattebayo. In romanji becoz it sounds retarded in english.

Tongue Tied

There are two matters that are contributing to my general sense of having a whole bunch of words lodged in my throat. Hopefully, these words will find themselves flowing out more fluidly on the internet.

Firstly, this issue involves the recent death of actor Heath Ledger. When i read this article, my first reaction was shock which turned into the familiar burn of rage. Just one day after Heath's untimely demise, Reverend Fred Phelps of Westboro Baptist Church announces that church goers will picket his funeral. I believe this church belongs to a group called God Hates Fags and on the official announcement on the website, Heath is lambasted for his role as a gay cowboy in Brokeback Mountain. If you cannot view the link that ive attached, the gist of the article is that Heath is a "pervert" for promoting homosexuality in the "sordid, tacky bucket of slime seasoned with vomit known as Brokeback Mountain". It also states that he is now in "hell serving his eternal sentence". You know, i try not to generalise and i would willingly concede that not all christians carry this narrow-minded, petty mindset. But when i read articles like this, my first thought is HOW DIGUSTING, CAN'T THEY JUST LET HIM REST IN PEACE?

HOW DARE THESE RELIGIOUS ZEALOTS PLAY ON THE DEATH OF A HUMAN BEING TO SPREAD THEIR BIASED, HOMOPHOBIC MESSAGE.

I could rant and rave about religious doctrines and their restricted views, but i think this article can really speak for itself. Yeah this is the reason why i hate christianity and why i will NEVER step into a church. I'm gonna try giving christianity the benefit of the doubt. I'm not gonna adopt the same discrimatory mindset and be the same as these small minded people of this group.

[edited:the church seems to have taken down the official announcement from their website but they intend to protest the LA memorial for Heath Ledger]

The second matter had me in a much stronger chokehold. Took a trip down memory lane when i started reading a dear friend's blog entries, from the time when we were really close all the way to the point when we stopped talking to each other. Thinking back i realised i had let a friend down horribly and perhaps, im beginning to feel a slight regret. But at the same time it occured to me that if i had not done what i had, we both wouldnt have grown the way we did. I dont know if she will read this, but i hope she does. And i hope i can find the courage to talk to her again. To do so i suppose i would have to reach deeper into myself to untangle all the words that i want to say.

Moving on, i hope nat comes home soon and comes online. I need new songs =(

Happy Ending-Mika
This is the way you left me
I'm not pretending
No hope, no love, no glory
No happy ending

This is the way that we love
Like its forever
Then live the rest of our life
But not together

Wake up in the morning
Stumble on my life
Can't get no love without sacrifice
If anything should happen
I guess I wish you well
Mmm a little bit of heaven
But a little bit of hell

This is the hardest story that I've ever told. (ooooo)
No hope OR love OR glory
Happy ending's gone forever more

I feel as if I'm wasted
And I'm wastin' everyday

This is the way you left me
I'm not pretending
No hope, no love, no glory
No happy ending

This is the way that we love
Like its forever
Then live the rest of our life
But not together

Two o'clock in the morning
Something's on my mind
Can't get no rest
Keep walking around
If I pretend that nothing ever went wrong
I can get to my sleep
I can think that we just carried on

This is the hardest story that I've ever told. (ooooo)
No hope or love or glory
Happy ending's gone forever more
I feel as if I'm wasted
And I'm wastin' everyday

This is the way you left me, (oh I feel as if I'm wasted)
I'm not pretending
No hope, no love, no glory
No happy ending

This is the way that we love, (and I'm wastin' everyday)
Like its forever
Then live the rest of our life
But not together

Little bit of love

Rest In Peace

Initially, i came online with the intention of blogging about Cloverfield but it appears that that will have to wait until im in a better mood.

Just found out this morning that Heath Ledger passed away in New York yesterday from a suspected drug overdose..

I have nothing but respect for an actor of his calibre.. So this is really sad..

Rest in peace =( And my thoughts go out to his ex-wife and 2 year old daughter..

HeadAche

While using my lunch time to estimate costs for my first cosplay, i hit a wall...

Wig-$40 excluding shipping
Costume-$40
Contact lenses-$60
Steel katana from casears-$200
Kunai-$16.90
Shuriken-$16.90
Makeup-$30
Random paraphenalia (like arm guards, paint, gloves etc)-$50
Mask-$2

Shucks... I am working but its not exactly printing money so woohoo... An expensive hobby eh.. And my earphones broke today T.T How to save enough money to go Japan to shop????

Another reason for me to stay in Singapore to study?

Outing Much

Today, while out on my outing with Phoebe, i encountered a list of places where people should not walk at a snail's pace or stop completely:

1. In any part of a very busy and narrow street
2. At the start of an escalator
3. At the end of said escalator

Haiyo so much for being considerate..

Anyhoots, Phoebe and i had a great time dressing up (lmao) and meeting up at Far East Plaza to discuss our on again, off again Japan trip. And we got transportation, airplane tickets and accomodation outta the way.. Next meeting, we'll have to figure out the itinery. So exciting, i've never travelled free and easy before and to be doing it without bothering about parental restrictions is simply exhilarating. Hah another thing worth mention would be that i'm Phoebe's first outing partner since she got her busy job tutoring little kids. Oh and plus that i FINALLY stepped into Haru but i got no further in finding my ideal wig T.T

Btw, it's Gaara-sama's birthday today! 19th Jan.. Happy 16th birthday Gaara! *hugs* Wahh i swear arh when i get to Japan, im gonna go on a shopping spree and buy 7983213435612315606498749804282164645216 Gaara plushies/figurines/merchandise/whatnot... And thats not including the 1243512168465316 items of clothing/props that ill need for cosplaying.

ZOMG i need money! I have to stop my addiction to online shopping...

Hah one more week till the guys can book out and go home.. Haha Nat must be very happy! Jia you guys youll be free soon! ^^

P.S. Wait for the music to load if you have a slow com. Hah and listen to it all the way larh.. Nice song =)

Hisashiburi Des

Long time no see.






I found someone else with the same eyes as you.

=O

Oh my....


I'm shocked.

Haha i didnt know you can make phone calls in NS.. Seems like NS isnt that big a torture chamber after all xD

But i would never let them cut my hair lol

Playing The Critic

Omgosh AVP2 like sucked big time =/

With a title like aliens versus predator, one would expect at least a little more solo fighting scenes between the two different types of extraterrestrials to show off the fighting prowress of each species right... But the fighting scenes consisted mostly of predator one hit killing the aliens or lousy aiming on the predators part or unresolved fights that take place somewhere outside of the screen. o.O moreover the plot was focused too much on predictable human behavior (feeders, anybody?) and it took a turn on illogical where the predalien is concerned. Moreover the movie was hilariously short (1hr 30mins) so people who dont like to pay a huge amt of money for a short amt of time should not watch this. Erm actually in fact... Just dont watch this and wait for channel 5 to air it. AVP1 is airing tomorrow so you can like get your kicks free of charge on tv.

On the other hand... OMG Ayumi Hamasaki's new album rocks like nobody's business. xD
I became a diehard fan on her "My Story" album becoz the songs were fantastic and the videos were even better.. complementing the songs wonderfully. Plus the photobook featured like many many many sets and pictures. Then her next album "(miss)understood" came out and that didnt live up to my expectations coz the songs were more forgettable. And then the subsequent album "Secret" was like not really worth it. The videos werent great and neither was the photobook. So when i heard her 9th album "GUILTY" wasnt selling as well in Japan as her previous albums were i kinda panicked like omgosh did her career peak and then like go down the drain coz the albums were getting worse... Well im super glad i bought the album anyway coz "GUILTY" IS LIKE UNIMAGINALLY WAYYYY BETTER THAN MY FAVOURITE ALBUM. Every single song is super nice like once you listen you'll like it and photobook features like impressively delicious spreads.. The best part has to the be music videos coz they made a short film for 2 songs and the lead actor is like Shawn Yue. The story is not gonna win the most original storyline any day soon but still kudos to Ayumi and Shawn for sizzling on screen chemistry i wanna fall in love like that too! Hah i think i just fell in love with Shawn Yue's eyes. xD But besides the shawn yue video, all the other solo videos are also fantastic im like spamming the dvd lol...

SOooooooo yeayyyy im super proud of ayumi for churning out an album that surpassed my story. Esp since she has lost all hearing in her left ear.. TeamAyu forever!

sheesh i sound so fangirlish....

Spitfire

I believe all the people who know me would not use the word 'docile' to describe me.. In fact they would probably heartily agree that i am the brash sort, more of the act first think later type. They would also note my excessive use of swear words, thrown in whenever im high, happy, sad, pissed, annoyed and very very deranged.

While the former is an innate personality trait, something that im proud of and would not want to change, the latter is something not inborn, but picked up along the way on my journey through life. Swearing is something im not proud of and its a bad habit that reflects badly on my upbringing and character... much like biting your fingernails reflects badly on your hygeine (lol just an example larh). Its not so much that my parents dont care that im swearing... its just that i dont do it at home so they dont know its a problem... I know its bad but sometimes, it just slips out you know?

And so in 2008 i took on another Cut Down on Swear Words resolution.. While i havent failed terribly yet, i have had a few major relapses.. Namely today. This morning, when confronted by a large crowd in the mrt train, i kept my cool and just ignored the pushing.. But when it was time to exit the train, i was instead faced with this bunch of imbeciles people who wanted to rush in before letting others leave. So obviously my panic button was pushed and i sprouted every swear word in my vocab, probably to the amusement of the other passengers. The worst thing was that the stupid old man at fault probably didnt even understand a word of what i was saying GAHHH... Thank goodness i was wearing my ACJC shirt and not some VJ tee >.>

And now, after a quiet hour to self-reflect and compose myself, i obviously regret my actions.. But i just dont know how to like rectify it... I can tell myself now OK RACHE STOP SWEARING YOU BAKA but that doesnt help at situations when panic is high and crisis is imminent. I need to find a way to zen out in problematic situations and remove myself from these situations with minimum damage i.e im not gonna be a doormat and get pushed around in the mrt train -.-

Therefore if you can help please join in the Help Rachel Stop Swearing campaign. Or like Teach Rachel How To Zen campaign. Haiz what a sad mood dampener on my day.

Chapter 3!

Chapter 3 is done and sitting prettily on the first link on the left of the page. So clicky clicky and check it out to make the effort worth it =)

My 200th Post On 1st Jan 2008

Oh wow what a day of momentous milestones...

Firstly, its 1st Jan 2008 already and im posting my 200th blog post on the first day of a brand new year..

Secondly, since my sgcosplay account was not activating itself, i decided to take a LEAP and email the ANBU team leader.. And i told her "put me down in the team as confirmed", which she did. Which means i finally got over myself and my parents and JOINED THE TEAM!!!!!! I did it i did it i did it i did it xD

This is a good omen.. That the first thing i did in 2008 was to take a risk and i hope this bodes well for the other important things that will follow in the new year (results, uni, japan etc). Since i dont believe in wiping the slate clean, lets just think of this as adding more positive things on it. So cheers to the new year and cheers to ANBU cosfest'08 =)